The Color of the Sky is Relative

I'm going to mommy blog real quick, because what else am I doing with this space?

Obviously, naturally...my son is a genius. He learns fast, loves doing it, and is especially into language skills, which thrills me like you wouldn't even believe. Unless you know me at all, then you wouldn't have any trouble calculating the amount of joy I get out of this. I love - LOVE - to teach my kid.

Last night, as we were putting on his pajamas in the kitchen (what, you don't get ready for bed in your kitchen? Pssh.) he saw the fruit bowl on the table and asked for a plum. But he had trouble saying the word, "plum." I helped him sound it out, and he quickly corrected himself and got it right. He just turned three last month, and he's started concentrating on pronouncing words correctly now that he's got their meanings down.

"Yeah, that's a hard one to say. Let's try it. There's a Ppp...Ppp sound, then a Lll LLll sound. What letter makes "Ppp"?"

"P!"

"Right! Very good. And what letter makes "Lll?"

"L."

"Great, okay. This next one is tricky. What sound is next? Ppp...Lll...Uh. Uhhh. What letter is that, do you think?"

Not even a hesitation. Big grin: "That's a U."

When we were done, I said "How about that! You can spell the word PLUM any time you want now!"

That's the kind of thing we do together. We talk constantly (and sing, we sing a LOT), and I explain things, spell things, count things, describe things. Show him how and why this goes here and that does that. And give him words for all of it. It's my favorite thing to do in the world with this particular little human being.

Pretty great mom, right? Sure, except you guys - I don't know shit, and I never do anything right.

"Mommy, you don't sing yet, okay?"

"No, mommy. You sit here. No, you have to stand. Not there."

"Let's sing Wheels On The Bus!"
"Okay!"
"Oh. No, not that song yet."

"This is an airplane!"
"Oh, cool, I love airplanes. Let's fly!"
"Uh...no. It's a BOAT."
"Okay, boats are good. Are we sailing on the ocean?"
"No, Mommy. It's an airplane."

Like, duhhh. How stupid ARE you, exactly, Mom. Jeez. Are you going to keep embarrassing me like this all through college?

You bet I am, kiddo.

Pajamas firmly on, we went back to his bedroom and played for a while, and I did everything exactly wrong, as usual. He gleefully corrected me the whole time, then Shayne walked in the room.

"I can't seem to get anything right tonight, Daddy" I told him. "I bet he'd argue with me if I told him the sky's blue."

Heh. Watch this.

"Hey, Curt? Is the sky blue?"

He tiled his head to one side, half exasperated. "I don't know," he said. "Let me go look out the window." So he did. I was not expecting that.

"Umm..." he said, studying the window pane. "It's raining. And dark." He looked at me with his best "you're functionally retarded" look. "No, mommy. The sky is black."

I could not possibly be any prouder.

Animal FarmmmmM

Many, many times in my life I have refrained from sharing things I think are cool with people I like, because I want them to continue associating with me.

This really should have been one of those times.



Old McDonald had a...OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK



And that is why I no longer live in the extremely rural parts of anywhere.

30 Day Music: 1-4

A facebook friend of mine is doing a 30 day music meme, and I'm enjoying her answers. I haven't done an internet meme in a while, and I know good and well I will not commit to 30 days of consistent anything, so instead of that I'M POSTING THEM ALL AT ONCE.

I'll break it up into entries so it's not one giant scroll-through, but I had fun putting this together for my own amusement. Feel free to skip or skim this foolishness - sometimes I have looong, sloooow days to fill.

_________________________________________________


Day 1 - A song you would make your personal anthem if you took over the world

There's only one possible outcome to any set of circumstances that would lead to me being in charge of the world:



Day 2 - A song you play to make people think you have taste



Okay, fine. Less snarky answer:



Day 3 - A song that makes you bob your head



Oh hey, BTW, most of my music is NSFW! (lol)

Day 4 - A good song to have sex to

Now what would I know about that?

30 Day Music: 5-8

Day 5 - A song with deep lyrics

I don't know, I guess this one has "deep" right there in the title.



I'm not much of a lyrics girl myself.

Day 6 - A song that makes you want to dance around like an idiot with people watching

I never get that drunk, but this one makes me tap my foot and not care who knows it.




Day 7 - A song that reminds you of a lost love

I've been fortunate/guarded enough to have never had a lost love, but this song channels every fruitless, painful or embarrassing crush i've ever had:



Of course it does.

Day 8 - A song from a show/concert you've been to (sorry, 'to which you've been')

I have not been to a concert in years and years. The last one I went to, a lifetime ago, contained this:



My mom is so proud of me right now.

30 Day Music: 9-12

Day 9 - A song you would play to torture enemy combatants

This is a package deal: these two songs, repeating and alternating randomly.





Taste the pain.

Day 10 - A song that can pick you up out of a bad mood



:D

Day 11 - A song that can kill a good mood



D:

Day 12 - A song that reminds you of a good friend



HOLLA ATCHA GIRL.

30 Day Music: 13-16

Day 13 - A song that you want to play at your funeral



I would also like a nice cheese tray and some classy flowers.


Day 14 - A "sit alone in the dark with candles and a bottle of wine" song (you know you have one)



I have so many of these.

Day 15 - A song you are embarrassed to admit you used to like



Oh, you know it's true.

Day 16 - A song you are embarrassed to admit you currently like



Awkward 90s Duran Duran Forever.

30 Day Music: 17-21

Day 17 - A song you play to seduce someone

I am the least seductive person in the world. But I'm also not very subtle, so let's assume it would be something like



Day 18 - A song that reminds you of your childhood



Day 19 - A song that lifts your soul



Day 20 - A song that makes you nostalgic



Good times.

Day 21 - A song that confirms people's suspicions that you are a weirdo



^_^